I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
Convinced the bartender that I'm a congressman. Free Drinks. God bless America.
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
I need to stop making out with boys in plain view of half my class.
He looked like Harry Potter. I had to do it.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
Do you think drinking vodka, rum and sourpuss out of a water bottle, in a class that isn't even mine rude?
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
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