then the nurse gave me a bag with my personal belongings: phone, wallet. jacket, keys and a BTB burrito
he said i give him, and i quote, "emotional blue balls"
He was eating mac and cheese. Raw. Like as in he was eating the uncooked noodles then pouring the dry cheese in his mouth.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
They're pole dancing on a handicap sign post.
she looked at me completely serious and said "orgasms are 15% Stronger during a hurricane" and started to take all her clothes off
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
I just saw the co founder of Waffle House passed away Friday. Are you okay?
That's about the same time my life started falling apart... Coincidence?!?!? I think NOT!!!
just so it's not awkward when you get here, you and my dog have the same name.
Hahaha nice
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
Randomize
