Ambien. No doubt about it.
you were the other women for BOTH people in the relationship?
No offense but you kinda look like a Jack Johnson fan in that pic
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
Tried to make out with a statue, turns out it was a person.
Come my child we shall walk thru the pasture of amazing sex and corndogs. Hint:some corndogs are not corndogs.
I got laid while wearing a shirt with a picture with my little brother deep throating a banana on it.
I took an uber home at 6am. Went to Santanas, apparently they don't take american express. So the uber driver bought my burrito. Success!
I literally JUST MADE IT to the liquor store. I bought a box of wine with the lights off
I've never been to an orgy, but I would assume nachos wouldn't be out of the question at one.
Did i fall last night when u carried me home.
idk
OHHH yea you fell down the stairs face first
Sorry I missed your call. I was in the shower washing away my sins and sweat. Please tell me you want to get drunk as shit later.
Randomize
