I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
Crying babies in a bar. Really?
And she just changed the baby's diaper on the table. It's killing the beer garden.
I just found a Chris Hansen soundboard online, care to guess what I'll be doing all day?
He offered to take me out to a nice dinner but I told him I would rather he just pay for my beer this weekend
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
Got a personal ride from safe ride. I was crying so hard. The driver said think of something happy and I said Disney. In which I sang him Aladdin. So I got home ok
Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
That one dude should feel honored if he were to get herpes from you. Fuck that Guy. He is a herpe.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
If you end up wanting to sit on his face, just make a sound like a dying giraffe and I'll make myself scarce.
She took me into the bathroom and force fed me a panini, it was pretty good.
I met up with trey last night. He whispered in my ear "I love you" then raised his voice and said "but not in a I want to marry you kind of way, but if you died I would cry."
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
