this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
woke up this morning wit a massive hangover. walked to my truck and found at least 35 for sale signs, a stop sign, and a julie kim sign...need answers
yea, you decided to become a real estate agent last night on the way home from the party. You started bitchin about how Julie Kim was stealing all your buisness....
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
his electricity got shut off. i felt like a pilgrim searching for his dick.
You were passed out on the chair and when I asked you if you were okay you looked up and said "I'm fine, I was just pretending for a picture" then passed out again.
No. He just yelled "youre having one more orgasm!" So he made that happen and then he rolled over and went to sleep.
you kept thanking chef boyardee for having pull tab cans
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
This is just what we do. We meet guys, go back to their place, smoke all their weed & go home to compete in out own version of Cupcake Wars.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
You know it's been a good thanksgiving when you pee all over your own hands.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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