i've alrwady decidided boys hate me plkease take notyes.
what
nvm
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
That girl would be way hotter if she changed her face.
I wish orgasms lasted as long as the pain from rug burn
I love how my cats smell like pot.
If you like her enough, bring her with. If not, eloquently cunt punt that bitch through the field goals of life.
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I drank beer out of some sort of animal horn all night, then we fucked to a "viking metal" album. I feel like I should go pillage something to complete the Norse trifecta.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
we played his NES Classic. Turns out there is a warp zone to my vagina.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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