the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
Puked on a Tom Jones impersonator on the strip
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
I've never seen a homeless man jog to get off the bus and then run to his panhandling spot because he's "late for work," but you see something new every day.
He called me on my way to the bathroom and told me he wanted to hear me pee my beers out... That. Drunk.
did you not get the photos of the finger bruises on my ass?
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
I think I just got suckerpunched by a 14-year-old.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
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