ha so i just found a picture of you eating paper towels and many of Laura freaking out from it.
We were making out in the bushes when some dude comes and starts peeing beside us.
Ok a condom literally fell out of my underwear this morning, i have never been so confused.
you went around grabbing cigarettes out of peoples mouths and claiming you were curing cancer.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
I had to show the prof your text saying that I could pick up your midterm for you. I covered the part of the screen saying you weren't there because you were about to have morning choke sex.
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
please tell me you're in jail and for some reason they have wifi
Oh thank the gods of upholstery, i thought that was never coming out...
I learned so much about myself in that shower.
Named all the presidents in order between puke sessions while semi conscious so that's a thing I can do now
If catching your vomit in my hands while swimming in a bath tub full of it doesn't make us best friends, I don't know what will
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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