An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
I guess I should mention that I have already fucked the Fed Ex guy.
That changes everything.
I walked in and she was doing shots, betting the managers if any of the customers would notice, and screaming that nothing would ruin her Saturday night. Say what you want, I like working with my sister.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
Long story short he broke into a preschool and threw all their cones into a tree.
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
The things I do for you. Not that I'm unhappy about it. I'm just saying you should love me.
Did you sleep with him again?
No! I just led him to believe that I would if he gets me booze. Do I have that little class that you have such minimal faith in me?
Done deal I'm dying it right at this moment. I'll need a red Speedo and a half shirt that is extremely tight. Like nipple tight.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
Showering in not my own throw up is really hittin the spot right now.
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
Gov of Georgia is going to allow massage therapists to return to work.
Gives a new meaning to 'Happy Endings'.
i haven't seen you in two years and we have like 16 hours, all i want is cuddles, wine, and some light groping
Randomize
