Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
After I just paid $211 for my hair to be dyed and cut this guy at the bar said "I know you died your hair with koolaid, but I'd still fuck the shit out of you"
he was like a christmas ornament you would hang on the back of the tree....not great but still made the cut.
you knoww youre high when you are just as concerned as the contestants on ultimate cake off as they move their 250 lbs cake over the ramp
As im putting my laundry in the machine, i find a solo cup and a pong ball that i signed babe ruth
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
The party theme was heirs and heiress's. Most guys came in polo shirts but he came as the "arch duke of vagina".
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
some people waaaaait a lifetime for a hookuppp like this some people seeeearch forever for that one special handjobbb
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
fyi: first time in five days i havent washed my birth control down with liquor. when are we going out tonight?
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
Randomize