rhymes with "ouble enetration"
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
Why was I handcuffed to the roof?
It was easier then trying to explain why you couldn't fly
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
All three of them were helicoptering their dicks to persuade me to take my thong off
I just flicked a lizard out of the window with a bud light in one hand and spatula inthe other...dont tell me you dont miss the south
Heres a quick tip! When getting black out head from your girlfriend dont come to and say "wait... wheres my girlfriend"
I might be the strongest willed bouncer ever. Earlier tonight a girl flashed me trying to get in. I just replied "Sorry I'm gay", she believed me and left.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
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