so it turns out you can rearrange the letters in "scottsdale" to spell "milf city." who knew?
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
In a tragic sexting typo, I typed the word "blobjob". Now she's coming over and I have no idea what I'm in for...
repeat this after me. period at the beach is better than baby at the beach. breathe. and: period at the beach is better than baby at the beach.
Doing lines of cocaine in the bathroom and the word 'better' do not belong in the same sentence.
Attention ladies coming to the party tonight! Tonight will be another chance to win the 5 bucks for getting my cousin hard. Bring your a-game, no one has been able to overcome the whiskey dick yet. Good luck.
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
Meeting girls and telling em you have no hair on your calves is not an acceptable pick up line
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
I just climbed out the passenger side of my car because there was a spider on mine. I'm doing adulthood right
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
xanax give me strength to not ask where we stand with booty calls
They say find what you're good at... Evidently that's showing up late for everything, drinking, and eating cheese for me.
Randomize
