how can u be prego again
What the hell do I have to do to get some foreplay around here? This sucks.
I think you know the answer.
How can I marinade myself in Vodka?
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
still using moms red Christmas cookie plate she sent to cut lines on. not sure I can return with a clear conscious
If we worried less about pouring champagne down stripper crack, we probably wouldn't skip so many meals.
I find out next week of the Australian was lying about his vasectomy or not. Keep your fingers crossed!
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
Hey so when you left last night was i wearing shoes?
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
You left your phone here
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