i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
can you pick up canola oil? she lives by wegmans
who is canola oil?
you're an idiot.
he said no girl had ever swallowed his cum before
he probably also told you he thought u were pretty
If we have to be apart I understand. Being separated is probably best for our relationship now. I look forward to our booty calls.
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
THEY WONT LEYT ME IN AND I REALLY NEED SOME FRUIT
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
Oh wow. Was walking and just saw her in the pool, fully clothed, ranting on an alligator float. I guess i should go get her before security gets here.
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
My life is literally the worst. I was just laughing so hard at how hot they looked feeding each other the brownies and then I was like DON'T CRY
Should I be flattered that she mumbled "You're the king of my face" before passing out?
We moved the bed and she found my vibrator. The entire ride home was a montage of her singing "Are You Lonesome Tonight"
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Do you ever look at your life and go "i'm too sober for this bullshit"?
Every day of my life.
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