woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
The sun is out and the snow is finally starting to melt here... Vodka bottles keep popping up everywhere. Guess it's the college version of burying nuts for the winter
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
first party of the semester tomorrow. thinking of wearing a huge sign that says "my summer was good" to avoid the 67 questions and get straight to drinking
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
I think the pizza delivery guy is getting a handjob next door.
That moment when you sit down to shit and someone is watching porn on the other side of the wall.
I am convinced you could sleep through the apocalypse and only wake up because youre hungry & want Dominoes
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Do you think Root Touch Up or Just for Men would work better on pubes?
Cops swarmed my car last night in the walmart parking lot cause of the paper plate
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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