If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
friends don't let friends hook up with gingers.
I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
I'm not going to fuck him in his Honda Fit. That's gay.
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
No, no, we have to calibrate. What is the maximum amount of trouble we can get into without going to jail?
The last thing I remember was you puking all over the inside of my door and him yelling "PUKING RALLY!!!"
I plan on drinking enough to kill at least 2 frat boys and make an aa meeting weep for joy
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
And the 'kicked out of Xmas party' trophy goes to me. 3rd nomination, first win.
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Randomize