I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
I blew a .224 after sleeping for 6 hrs, cleary im a champion
He confessed to putting dry erase marker dots on my vibrator to keep track of when I "electronically cheated" and then passed out.
My professor complimented me on the well drawn penis on my face then asked if I would like a seat closer to the garbage can.
At the end of the night you handed the bartender a piece of paper with the word "VISA" written on it.
I feel like the other woman.
You ARE the other woman.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
Hahahahahahhajahahahahajajjajahjahahajahahajajahahahajjajajahahjajajajajahahahajjjajajaahhahhahahahahahahahaha dominos taxi
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
he was almost the father of your baby, you should let him take you to dinner
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
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