i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Why do you keep getting laid in MY dreams
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Whatever. I just smoked another bowl so I don't care and wow I just noticed how fast my thumb moves when I text. I'm amazing.
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
the amount I squirted last night was insane. Im glad i ignored tlc's advice, i went chasing waterfalls and loved every god damn minute of it.
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Thinking about wearing all black to the bar tonight since I'll be attending my liver's funeral.
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
Randomize