we had that weird still in bed morning after conversation. Her dad is the vp of my company.
Dude I just peed on my pants. not in them though. and yes there is a difference
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
Katy Perry is on a Proactiv commercial. That "I kissed a girl" shit is so much less hot now.
It got messy; I did a shot of seamonkeys.
Ummm didn't i have pubes when i went to bed last night?
I need an adult. someone more adult than my current state
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Plus he stuck it in when you were sleeping which would have been the tipping point for me but you art school kids are all liberal and shit
I literally farted midsex as a siren for him to get the fuck off me.. No such luck.
Just saw the mall santa roll by on a rascal scooter holding a chic-fil-a milkshake and stop to chat up trio of cute 20-somethings. New hero.
I was stuffing my vagina with gummy bears last night having him eat them out of me. Team Haribo for the win!
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Randomize
