yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
It was a two-sided wall so part of my body ended up in someone elses condo.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Tough to be a good wingman when you puke on yourself and everyone w/in a 5 ft radius at the FIRST bar we go to so don't tell me to step my game up
so my mom thinks I'm picking you up just to go buy you liquor before you go back to school tomorrow...
I'm ashamed that your mom thinks I haven't already taken care of that.
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
he went down on me while I ate Oreos. I don't know what caused the orgasm.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Randomize
