how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Anddd after the worst sex of my life, he said.."do you mind taking off the condom, tying it up, and throwing it at the door?" Weird.
I just walked by that girl who tried to commit suicide over me in high school. That was weird.
I can't even teach it... It's just natural slutyness.. My mom has it too
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
Me and the guy at the liquor store are on a first name basis, college is all about networking.
They should really start adding the average cost of day drinking to our cost analysis sheets. Does FAFSA cover this? No. It doesn't.
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
I just asked him what would happen if my boobs fought crime. I think I'm cut off.
You literally just told me you're ditching me because of pizza. PIZZA? Wow.
I think the cop who arrested me yesterday is at my gym rn should I say hi
Just motorboated this 18 year old girl at the bar. The first time was my idea the other 3 she made me. Maybe turning 27 won't be so bad. Haha.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
Randomize
