You do realize the lyrics aren't "hold me close TONY DANZA" right?
You can't be serious.
Awkward medical moment of the day: A very obese girl with a disorder that literally makes her hit herself punched herself in the face. Literally. While screaming 'MCDONALDS MONEY'. Right. Beside. Me.
i had a dream that your penis turned into a long neck dinosaur
did it start talking like on Land before time?
I need a leather bustier to keep them in.
Too kinky for 11:30am. Stop that.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
He told me to come in and have some water before I drove home, my vagina didn't stand a chance escaping. We didn't even make it to the kitchen.
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
I'm a lady who knows what she wants in life, and that's uncommitted dick.
I feel like I might be the only person I know who eats bundles of radishes in-between orgasms from their vibrator.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
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