I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
It feels like Jesse James cheated on America.
we had you propped up in a chair and fed you donuts. i've never seen you happier
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
Just violated the laws of fuck-buddyship and talked to him about my personal life. I don't like it.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
There's nothing like sitting directly behind someone you fucked 5 years ago at church on Easter Sunday
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Well I don't think you can suck his dick while he's making pizza. I think that goes against some health codes.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
drunk snapchatting is the worst, because i woke up with great pictures of my tits saved to my memories and no idea who i sent them to
Why do I have this feeling like this is heading in a slightly threesome-y direction
Randomize
