I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Yeah, he has a kid now! Shit... You know you're all grown up when the people you used to have threesomes with become parents
I almost itched my nose with the lit end of a cigarette. Help.
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
This is my second month of college and all I've learned is how to get a guy to go down on me without asking out loud and not to chase everclear with Smirnoff ice.
Essential life skills
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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