She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
Sorry I couldn't answer your call, I'm expecting a call from Chris Hansen.
I'm guessing you didn't end up going to the bar last night.
Nope. Ended up at what I believe was a slumber party down the street.
Excuse me by sucking dick i am fighting crime. Just think of all the prostitues going out of business and getting real jobs.
He nailed 50 frozen hamburgers to the ceiling last night. Now there are flies every where.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
my heaven will be filled with hot naked men covered in chick-fil-a sauce and me wearing a bib
Don't bang him. The amount of Jack Johnson he listens to is embarrassing for even a white person.
I woke up to 76 pages of e's, r's, d's, and f's from when I fell asleep for 3 hours on my laptop keyboard trying to write that paper.
I'm not drunk because I think my blood just is alcohol from last night so being drunk is sober. If that makes sense
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Please tell me those naked pics were not your mom. Lie if you have to.
Also I think I drunkenly signed up to be an uber driver or something because they keep emailing me to fill out a background check
how much do I hate his dog? was just googling to see if you can rent a hungry eagle for the weekend hate.
I had to join a gym to keep up with this 22 yr old
You have GOT to stop kicking in his kitchen door. Just wait for him to open it next time.
Randomize
