we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
Turned in a paper today on drug abuse. Chose to write about percocet. Just realized I started 2 sentences with "This amazing drug"
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
Do you have any idea how hard it is to concentrate on legal issues with the ghost of his giant penis in me?
Really, thanks for buying me caribou, it helped me out. Today will forever be the day I threw up in a caribou cup in the skyway outside of chipotle.
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
Don't be too mad at the guy who broke your kitchen table. Didn't get his name, but he knew all about your gay porn career. Like DETAILS...
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
So I decided to sleep with him for the first time in months so I can convince him it's his kid instead of the other guy
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