she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
you were licking his little sister's watercolors and trying to paint with your tongue.
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
i need to find a birthday card for her that tells her how happy i am that i can now legally bang her
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
I just want it to be said that I had sex in my Belle dress last night. Classy motherfucker.
He texts me "what are you wearing" in the middle of the workday, so naturally I assume he's kidding and respond "the blood of my enemies" #foreveralone
I woke up this morning with my hand on his dick. That sneaky bastard.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
Can we do lunch at 3? I have a blowjob scheduled for 2.
You schedule blowjobs?
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
if i had an alexa it would be saying “have sex with guys that don’t care about you”
Randomize
