How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
Beer and cheesecake and spinning in cirlcles why did you let me do this to myself
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
HIV testing and a light brunch. Sounds like a great way to spend Christmas Eve.
Maybe you'll have a Christmas miracle
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
What am I even going to do with 20 more jello shots? And don't say give them to the cat
Between fucking and sleeping I woke up missing four out of five of the earrings I was wearing. It's like a star rating system. I had to give him props.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
Well 1) stay calm 2) stay safe 3) drink more
Randomize
