Last night was def like the makeout party episode of full house
i woke up to see him pissing on your n64. thats like killing a unicorn. punishable by death for sure.
so i was sitting on this guys lap, and we were flirting and everything right..well his phone kept ringing, turns out it was his pregnant wife...she had gone into labor..
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
u downloaded tardy 4 the party
then u started screaming about not wanting nene on the record
Whoever had sex in my bed during the party last night left a glow in the dark condom on my floor. I'm not even mad anymore, I just want to know who it is so they can tell me where to get one.
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
I guess at this point I should stop judging guys on their looks and more on their major and trust fund. Growing up sucks.
oh, so if i go friday and she's there, you are going to be my sponsor for not banging the crazy chick
I ended up naked with smirnoff caps on my nipples. Dignity is now a completely foreign concept to me.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
You should help rebuild my confidence with your dick. Altruism: Pass it on.
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
Randomize
