just had a super intense, drunken debate about which blink182 member is the most fuckable. i got so mad i left the room. new low.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Also, just almost microwaved cereal. Thank god mom is here to stop me.
Dude, the lecture theatre is caving in on me.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
This chick at the gym, just informed me I was super funny this weekend. Especially when I untied her friends bikini top after throwing up in the women's restroom. SWEET black out chronicles has another story
You thought you were Snapchating on your tablet, but were really just poking John Stamos' face on my Full House dvd case...
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
I don’t mind that he’s uncircumcised. It’s the fact that he talks about the Bible immediately after we have sex .
What part of the grouping of the words "anal beads" confuses you?
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
