I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
trying to figure out who visited the hillshire farms website enough for it to be in my top sites.
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
I really appreciate you zipping up my pants at the bar. You didn't even ruin my Bermuda triangle.
He blended the pizza with water and drank the whole thing. He is my hangover hero
The last time I saw you, you were rolling around on the ground at the bar.....
.....well it was bound to be an interesting night since I was chasing my pulls with pulls....
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I just remembered touching your bosses wife's fake tits last night. Thanks again for taking me to your work function.
Tom just texted me he's Tindering from his hospital bed while they're running heart tests on him.
That's dedication to the game.
I find him attractive in the absolute weirdest way. Like I need him to do my taxes, but I also feel like I should spill things on him to gain his attention and then lick it off to gain his affection.
Thanks for having me over last night. Sorry I licked rum off your kitchen floor.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
Question: how does one descretely ask the ice cream truck driver thats out at 10:00pm if he sells weed?
Randomize
