They need to add a relationship status option on fb that says "having the baby of..."
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
yea I went to the store high again.. I think we're having pie for dinner.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
I spent most of my night in the men's room eating popcorn on the garbage can conversing with strangers pissing
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
I lost Mario kart three times but I got laid so it wasn't the WORST night I've ever had.
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Grandpa just whipped it out and started pissing on the way to the game stuck in traffic. I saw EVERYTHING. :(
Randomize
