someone shit in a solo cup and left it at the base of the stairs. fuck orlando dude.
You might not want to sit on your couch. Actually you may want to throw it away. My bad.
i dont want to stoop that low. but my dick does.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
So heartbroken my rebound has a rebound
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
Doing a small happy dance cause my cocaine successfully went through airport security
Rum and your dick are involved. You're relying on the unreliable narrator.
Like he was cock blocking and it usually takes ten cocks to block this cock
you were just in my dream and you looked at me and said "Christmas is cold." I think you're wasted even in my dreams.
When we were finished she immediately got up, cut a star out of a piece of paper, colored it gold, taped it to my chest and deemed me the Sheriff of Sex.
Randomize
