Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
I will also inform you that stairs change when you change a house. Those hurt.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
you finished all 5 burgers, started crying tears of joy, and then claimed the tears were actually just 'meat sweats' from your eyes
Actions speak louder than pants.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
the repo guy said it was the first time he'd ever started to repo a car with someone fucking inside of it. he might have said 'doing it' instead.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
So did he inherit the massive family cock?
:(
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
we're so committed to being not committed
We found you in the bathroom at 1AM throwing money into the toilet making wishes. That drunk.
.... Seriously?
Woke up this morning with a plate of ravioli in my bed. Who says being single can't be fun?
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize