I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
It was not a dingleberry, it was a dinglemelon
I'm still reeling over the fact that you beat us all at Risk while you were flat on your ass drunk and falling asleep on South America.
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
do you think she knows her nickname is brickface?
The cabbie told us to at least pretend we weren't doing coke while he was driving
Just talked to Laura, confirming that is my bra. Hope it goes well with the rest of your wall decorations.
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
The only words we could get out of him as he stared catatonically into space were "Everyone I know and love is dead"
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Stop trying to mix nacho cheese and sex. Guys don’t want hot cheese near their junk. Pick a better fetish
Randomize
