You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
Have you resumed life with the rest of the world yet or are you still huddled in the fetal position while wearing compression gear?
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
When you're all settled in, text me, and I can sorta apologize for saying that your phone can suck my dick. What I really meant to say is that your Windows phone can suck my Android phone's dick.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
I told him that I wanted his dick like I wanted a jumbo hot dog. There something wrong with my priorities
Strip club or gay bar tonight?
I am an emotionally compromised bisexual.
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
Is there ever a non-asshole time to play the "I was a child prodigy" card?
She's Jesus crazy. And one if not more other forms of crazy. She's 2.5+ crazy.
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
Randomize
