I just found a frying pan...in my bed.
If there's anything in this world better than hotboxing in the rain I haven't found it yet.
Agreed
i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
dpoing straight shots of jhameson. boys are imp ressed. i apologize
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
The only way that night could have gotten any better would be if a unicorn would descend from the heavens with a nacho bell grande in a bag around its horn beat boxing Hakunah Matata.
He sent me nudes and then a text asking if I tried the new Cantina Bowl from Taco Bell. He sure does romance right, doesn't he?
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
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