am i at home because theres a dig starrrrring at me and i dont know wit plus i haer sirens. run fast.
Granted, we were all high and wasted, but the fact that she thought we couldn't see her making out with the charles in charge lookalike bc she was holding up a pillow in front of them is a little ridiculous
Did he look more like 80s Charles in Charge or the old one that had that VH1 show? It makes a difference.
the people of mcdonalds are all starring at me & this dude like they know we just slept together
Just spent 45mins blow drying a joint i dropped in a beer....i felt like i dropped his infant child....
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
5am is far to early to be on jagerbomb number 6 right now
Can we dedicate this weekends marathon sexcapades to all the haters?
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
Maybe you should start carrying pepper spray. You are like the Justin Bieber of lesbians.
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Somehow my family started talking about sex toys at breakfast.
She pinched my nipples too hard I THINK THEYRE GONE
I TOLD YOU ABOUT GOTH CHICKS BRO. I WARNED YOU
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