All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
My life has literally become a dickpocolypse. Thank you, summer, I missed you.
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
I know it sounds like a good idea, but doing Spanish homework at a bar just because the owners are Mexican and they give us margaritas really wasn't the best decision.
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I'll call you tomorrow. I'm ok and back i love you goodnight.
I stole a bike. Here's a pic
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Probably twitter. Never underestimate a psycho girl with wifi
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
Randomize