I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
uh, 3 redbulls and 400mg of caffeine pills and i still feel like life is in slowmotion..lets not take tranquilizers again.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
What drink are we having for lunch?
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
Please tell me that all of the things I remember doing last night didn't really happen. Please.
He kept saying I needed to go to the hospital and it just made me want to call him a pussy so I went to bed
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
Good, I don't think Coke dipped ring pops hold up in the mail anyway.
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
How did I get home last night?
We put your keys on a lanyard that asked anyone that found you to bring you home. A nice man in a cape, green shorts and a mesh shirt dropped you off this morning.
Oh. Yeah. Riiiggghhht
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