Dude I can't believe you let me go home with the wildabeast lastnight.
You always hook up with hot girls we had to know you were mortal
Just cleaned up my puke with my lecture notes.
He keeps the condoms in his bible. I guess stairs or elevator, we're getting to hell one way or another.
The coffee from our coffee maker just hasn't tasted normal since we made Mac n cheese in it that one time....
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
I definitely did a line of something I don't know with a Pagan biker. I make good decisions.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
Beer Olympics must happen in honor of the legit Olympics.
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Well the grass always *looks* greener on the other side but sometimes that’s bc there’s a sewage runoff...
Randomize