Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
Getting high on the stoop of a brownstone in the middle oh harlem. Doesn't get much more hey arnold than this.
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
He asked if I was on the pill, apparently I just downed my glass of beer and winked at him...
Eberyones makin fun of me cuz I found a snail and caught him and put him in a bocks for u
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
I couldn't tell if they ere dancing or fucking but they won the costume contest
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
Just bought a colored water bottle so my classmates can be so judgemental when I bring beer to class.
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
