a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
Though I feel a moral obligation to take you there, point out all of the male supervisors and slap you on the wrist and yell, "NO!!"
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
I'm wearing a dinosaur hat bikini cone bra over my shirt. So good things are happening
You have no idea the kind of bodily contortions I had to do to access your neighbor's WIFI
Of course I'm using oj as a mixer, its flu season.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
I woke up with her finger in my vag. Let's just say that I'm one horny inquisitive drunk.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
I think every girl deserves a pregnancy scare. Because then it just feels like such a priviledge to be bleeding out of the vagina.
I legit just did a jig towards my box of tampons.
It's difficult when the romantic and the hedonist in me are fighting. I want him to respect me and hopefully pursue an actual relationship, but then I remember he fucks like a GOD and loves my kink. Oh, life's hard.
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