You Definitely drank the goldfish bowl like it was a giant margarita
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
My shirt is ruined. If I ever get the idea of doing a tequila shot through my nose ever again, shoot me.
Let's not refer to him as Dustin. That makes him seek like a real person, not just a dick I would like to experience.
Don't you dare blame me for walking in one walking in on ur fuck session....u decided to fuck where we hid our booze
there's a guy in the del taco parking lot doing pushups. let's be his friends
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
he sneezed into my face mid-kiss
Bless his heart
If pulling your dick out counts as a hobby that is his.
Talked a police officer into driving us the 1/2 mile home from the bars because we didn't want to walk. I never knew the back of cop Cars had plastic seats.
Ok. Yes. He has a tiny penis. But he also has a trust fund.
It’s like a sexy version of those choose your own adventure books from when we were kids. No matter what you choose, there will be penis!
Randomize
