Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
And if not, hey- I've never had a restraining order before, so that will be cool
It could be our claim to fame
Done. I'll pack a cooler.
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
I saw him on the jumbotron, its like god doesnt want me to forget his tiny penis
Next time we throw a party together I would appreciate it if you didn't try to get my friends to hook up with friends of yours you know have herpes
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
The difference between 22 and 28 is bigger than I realised. I had the urge to put on Spongebob and give him a cookie.
New Serial podcast is out. We can listen to it tonight instead of having sex.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
How in the fuck did you get LIVE MOTHER FUCKING BATS!?!?! Into my ROOM last night????
Randomize
