i just overheard my mom tell my dad he should drink less so he could hit the right hole
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
His glasses broke on the way to the bar aNd he ended up talking to this butterface all night. I didn't have the heart to tell him
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
1.) You left the rest of your whiskey here 2.) I drank your whiskey 3.) then made a steam roller out of the bottle 4.) Everything tastes like whiskey
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
Maybe he'll be famous someday and I can forget that anything embarrassing may have happened and just say that I fucked that famous guy.
They're frat boys at heart and have sickly, dusty, rotting souls.
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
I'm waiting for you in a manthong right now.
Sexual side note: sushi and cum do not mix well. That is all.
Randomize
