He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
He was such a tease, he pulled out his dick, let me touch it then put it away
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
You were crying in a drunken stupor for an hour because "the new daft punk album didn't blow your tits off"
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
Just checking to make sure you weren't kidnapped, pregnant or watching Fox News.
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
where the fuck are you? she just tazed two people and we're tripping shrooms...successful first night in new apartment!
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
I am not a whore. I just wanted casual drinking, monogamous sex and occasional McDonald's runs.
Randomize
