Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
Opportunity cost of getting to econ after a night on the town > marginal benefit of attending class
Why does Thanksgiving make hot girls feel disgusting and fat girls feel horny? Its killing my prospects.
this is the second time in my life i thought i might need to go to rehab. im including all the mornings that i wake up in dewey beach as "the first time"
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Fuck my life, there's a fry in my vagina.
Don't come. It's not even a party it's a total sausage fest. Like 20 drunk dudes in a bedroom. We can still drink by ourselves though it'll be ok
i need to put some appletini on your dick
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
I've never had to say don't judge me for chip clips in the shower before
I really prefer to do my walks of shame in the summer
Randomize
