Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
i was trying to wake him up so i just kept touching his dick
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
I think we need a list of things that are automatic NO's for dating a guy. Married, definitely a no now
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I threw up in a flower pot outside the bar last night and have a date tonight....I think I missed something
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Randomize
