You're only the seventh guy she's ever kissed. Somesones gunna get EPICALLY stalked
omg i can't drink anymore.. i just pulled up my dress and started playing with my vagina
you yelled that ur labia majora was swollen at 3 am in the dorm hallway
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Weird question, would you want to do fetish porn? you get paid.
Ima go for a jog. and I'm going to jog until I throw up a lung. then I'll crawl home.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
I be dancing. See you soon. You can drink tequila from my pants.
I just tried to order ice cream on my bagel. I think I should just call it
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Randomize
