if you force a hooker to have sex with you and dont pay her would it be rape or theft? something to ponder
im six kinds of drunk right now
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
I went to his work to give him some blankets and ended up blowing him in the bathroom. See what happens when you don't come over?
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
I miss waking up, opening the closet downstairs, and finding you inside passed out.
1 month til my stepdad becomes a u.s. citizen, so if you want to get in on the divorce pool its your last chance, $5 a square.
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
He just had a handle of vodka with ice in it yelling at people hot august night mother fuckaaaaa and was pouring it on his face
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
Tomorrow I'm going to tape my thumbs to my palms and my biceps to my abdomen to learn what it's like to be a t-rex for a day. Anyone else in?
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