absolutely 100% incorrect. and i love you more you silk skinned goddess
did the walk of shame from ex-boyfriend's room only to find other ex-boyfriend sitting in the living room. some people shouldn't be allowed to be friends.
some people shouldn't be allowed to be desperate.
WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
we where pretty evenly matched until he threw me through that wall
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
LESSON OF THE DAY: Saying Everclear gets you out of explaining anything.
We fucked while The Odyssey played in the background. Homer would be proud.
not sure what the chiropractor did but my junk deserves a cape now.
You stumbled in the door as high as a kite, & ran into the table. I asked you if you were all right. You replied with "I don't have any soup."
Just got back to the apartment. Why os there now 14 identical toothbrushes in the bathroom and only the two of us live here?
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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