He uses pillows to masturbate.
some girl just asked me how to spell unconscious. I really want to know what she was texting.
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
you can feel better about your life now. i slept with a guy who has gold teeth
good news. according to wikipedia, my blackout might just have been "post-trauma amnesia"
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
ever have one of those nights where you feel like you should leave the house with your insurance card? that is tonight, my friend.
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
sorry
why?
oh you didn't look in the living room yet, did you?
Sorry about sucking tonight. Drunk truck fucking is apparently not my strong point.
Eating a grilled cheese at a strip club... good idea??
It was like, once I started flashing you, I couldn't stop.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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